It's raining prisoners, rap music, and Geo Tracker driving bananas

I went to the hospital not long ago because I thought my kidney stones were acting up. And lucky for me the county hospital is also where they take the prisoners after they experience what I call "racial differences". The day I was there the Mexican crew hadn't fared well in the daily prison yard squabble and there they were lining the emergency room halls in orange jumpsuits and chains. When the doctor tended to the various toothbrush shiv wounds the common consensus was that they had all fallen off the top bunk in their cells. Makes you wonder when the state is going to invest in some guard rails for those dangerously stabby prison bunk beds. Scary pokey beds!

On a separate note that has absolutely nothing to do with hospitals or prison shankings, I pleasantly discovered that listening to rap music makes any incredibly long drive not so dreadful and tedious for me. I find myself smiling the entire time and even mouthing the words. For some reason every time I hear Snoop Dogg melodically voice the words "guess who's back in the mother f*#@ing house with a fat d*#k for your mother f*&%ing mouth" I get a warm fuzzy feeling inside. Westsiiiiiiide!

Speaking of random (I wasn't, but everything I write tends to be incredibly random and totally schizophrenic)... While driving to lunch the other day I saw a banana driving a bright blue Geo Tracker down Central. I swear to God, a banana. Driving. A Geo Tracker. Now, a couple things: if I had a job where I had to wear a giant banana suit, my personal preference would be to don the suit once I got to work. Plus my car is way impractical for a banana suit. A Geo Prism is too small and the windows are tinted so one wouldn't really be able to appreciate seeing my banana ass driving down the street. If I had a bright blue Geo Tracker, on the other hand, I would be provided with spacious leg room and a sun roof for the top of my banana suit to stick out of. And the bright blue nicely complemented the yellow of the suit.

When I told my friend about the banana incident we got into this absurd conversation about wearing a banana suit instead of going into the Witness Protection Program. Put on the suit and instant secret identity! But if you worked with someone else also in the Witness Protection Program then you would be wearing the same thing and that would just be embarrassing. (By the way, sitting at your desk at work wearing a giant banana suit... that is the best image EVER.)