Holy taffeta, I'm in hell!

Today I met up with Tammi and Bridget at David's Bridal to pick out another wedding dress for Tammi's wedding. "Another wedding dress" being a long story for another blog. So as the Maid of Horror... I mean Honor, I did my duty and wrangled and strapped Tammi into only about 85% of the stock they had in the store and she managed to filter it down to about 4 or 5 dresses that were absolute YES's. But in doing this filtering she made Bridget and me put on a few of the dresses so she could see what they looked like on a body all at the same time. Holy hell.

I'm not going to lie. I've done the Monica and totally tried on one of Tammi's wedding dresses that I was holding for her in the closet of my apartment so her fiancee wouldn't see it. I didn't clean the house wearing it, but I did try it on and walk around pretending that I was the one getting married. I think I may have sat around in it and watched some Dawson's Creek episodes. I mean if you had to choose to watch Dawson's Creek in your normal clothes or a wedding dress, come on. No comparison. You can even change the show. Won't matter. The wedding dress will win every time.

So at this point in time I'm sweating and I swear I almost broke out in hives with that damn poofy dress on. I was all pasty white and out of place too. It never makes me realize more than when I'm hangin with Tammi and her friends just how "different" I am from them. And I feel all weird and awkward and clumsy the whole time until I get drunk or leave and then I'm just happy I'm not trying to dye my hair that same shade of blonde the rest of them are. Because let me tell you... me and blonde hair... just... BAD.

On a side note, I should really consider working at these bridal shops. I harranged Tammi in and out of those dresses with the speed of lightning. If I could deal with telling girls in ugly dresses that they looked pretty. Seriously they had a dress with a 7 inch red hem on the bottom of it. Yeah, I just threw up a little in my mouth at the memory of it. (And sorry if "harranged" isn't a word.)